El Niche Cache
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Scotty’s Word
Having written two different NRL-ish things in 24 hours, my footy brain’s been on over-drive and in the essence of yesterday’s Diary of An Aotearoa Warriors Fan entry, I’ve boiled down all my thoughts into one nugget that you can take with you on your travels. The Warriors boiled out impurities and extracted maximum flavour from those who came before to get the concentrate that will take them forward and my noggin’ has gone through the same process:
Phil Gould and Peter O’Sullivan were the best hunters of footy talent from Aotearoa for Australian clubs, for 15+ years.
Gould and O’Sullivan will now team up at NZ Warriors to do the opposite - their job is to keep the best talent in Aotearoa.
How can that be anything other than a massive positive?
For those who don’t know: O’Sullivan is the Warriors recruitment manager and first scouted talent for Melbourne Storm, then Sydney Roosters.
That’s the nugget. Use it wisely in discussions with folks who can’t quite see through the fog.
I had a hunch about the below information from Sydney Morning Herald, Danny Weidler laid it all out clearly…
Couple of notes sparked from yesterday’s Super Rugby contest between Crusaders and Highlanders, which Crusaders won to wrap up the championship. First and foremost we got a Crusaders haka:
Codie Taylor’s at the front, yet I reckon it is Whetu Douglas leading the haka and during this game I pondered how good Douglas and Highlanders #8 Marino Mikaele Tu’u were. Neither is a celebrated kiwi rugby player and to be honest, that Crusaders vs Highlanders game featured a bunch of ‘who the fuck’s that dude?’ type of players.
That’s how NZ rugby rolls. Every year different blokes slide into starting roles and impress, it’s never-ending and while some buzz about the exodus to Europe, there is always someone coming through who wants that spot.
Quick research led me to see that Douglas went to Gisborne Boys High School, while Mikaele Tu’u went to Hastings Boys. Douglas is 29 and himself went to play in Europe, Italy specifically where he played for Benetton. That stint in Italy came after making his Crusaders debut in 2017 and he returned to the Crusaders in 2018. Later bo Kieran Read and Douglas finds himself playing nine games this year, winning Super Rugby Aotearoa and leading the Crusaders haka.
Mikaele Tu’u is 23, started with Hawkes Bay and was then picked up by the Highlanders. Winning’s important and I love jokers who play their role in winning teams, so the stat comparison below isn’t to say Mikaele Tu’u is better than Douglas, merely for comparison’s sake (for the whole Super Rugby campaign)…
Douglas: 81 runs, 1.2m/run, 87 % tackling, 11 try assists, 7 turnovers won.
Mikaele Tu’u: 110 runs, 3.2m/run, 85 % tackling, 15 try assists, 12 turnovers won.
Shout out to Josh Ioane’s stepping game which may be the hottest in Aotearoa after his performance yesterday. I reckon Richie Mounga’s the best #10 in Aotearoa and that’s going to offer some funky All Blacks combos juggling the likes of Beauden Barrett and Damien McKenzie, Mounga’s borderline impeccable though.
Let’s compare Mounga to other notable first-fives/fullbacks…
Mounga: 5.2m/run, 81 runs, 85 % tackling.
Otere Black: 1.5m/run, 31 runs, 82 % tackling.
Barrett: 3.2m/run, 37 runs, 67 % tackling.
Aaron Cruden: 2.1m/run, 71 runs, 79 % tackling.
Jackson Garden-Bachop: 1.6m/run, 35 runs, 62 % tackling.
Lydia Ko couldn’t get the job done at the LPGA Marathon Classic, stumbling in the last five holes to hand the win over to her close friend Danielle Kang. Bummer for sure, although in the context of Ko’s career, everything’s moving in the right direction and given where Ko’s come from and that Kang won last week’s tournament; Kang was better prepared to win.
You’ll see a lot of negativity around Ko for how she lost, I prefer to keep things positive through the wide lens. This was Ko’s first top-20 finish in eight tournaments stretching back to August last year and it was Ko’s first top-10 finish in 12 tournaments going back to July last year. Ko needs time to embed herself in top-20, then top-10 and do so consistently - that’s far more important than a one-off win and then slipping back to the middle of the pack.
Couple jams…
Wildcard’s Notebook
It’s a bit of a wild one to wake up on a Monday morning to talk of any Flying Kiwis transfer gossip but Chris Wood to Lazio really did snap me to attention. There have been many completely bonkers rumours over the years, Mark Paston to Spurs is one that springs to mind, while it wasn’t that long ago that Chris Wood was being talked about as a recommended option for Arsenal – which isn’t the same thing as an actual rumour, it’s probably just some old battler on the radio saying Arsenal need more steel in their team and hey how about that tall fella for Burnley, whatshisname? Tree or Forest or Wood or something.
This Lazio rumour stems outta Italy’s Corriere Dello Sport, ‘reporting’ that Lazio need a new striker before the next Italian season begins, what with Felipe Caicedo expected to leave which means minimal cover behind Ciro Immobile. To be fair though that report is 90% about the prospect of signing Joshua King from Bournemouth (makes sense since they just got relegated and he’s only got a year left on his deal, although apparently Bourney are asking big bucks) and only includes two sentences at the very end of the piece which say...
“Dall’Inghilterra è spuntata anche la candidatura di Chris Wood, attaccante del Burnley. É stato proposto, ma per il momento Tare si sta concentrando su altre piste.”
Which old mate Google Translate suggests means something along the lines of...
“Also from England, another candidate is Chris Wood, striker for Burnley. It has been proposed, but for the moment Tare is focusing on other paths.”
My Italian is no good but I wouldn’t put too much credit to any of that. You have to remember that 90% of football transfer rumours are completely fabricated and the other 10% you still have to balance where the information came from, who stands to benefit, and all that. Chris Wood signed a new contract back in November so he’s not out there trying to find leverage for more money. And anyway the article literally says that the club are looking at other options... which reminds me of that old political trick of denying knowledge of a situation that nobody even knew existed, which ironically brings attention to it by making it look like you’re deflecting attention. The Mail Online picked up the yarn and suggested that Wood’s agent offered him up because the dude is open to new challenges in his career at this time but the Mail is the scummiest of all the scumrags so don’t worry about anything they have to say on any matter. Chris Wood’s not going to Lazio, lol.
Speaking of All Whites fellas, how about Marco Rojas lately? Four goals in two games for Melbourne Victory. They’re not gonna make the playoffs – guaranteed in tenth in fact which is crazy for Melbourne Victory – but the so-called Kiwi Messi (doesn’t it feel like that’s a nickname that only people outside Aotearoa ever use?) has been immense these last couple games. Some of these finishes are deceptively tricky.
It’s a strange time for Flying Kiwis transfers too because we’re technically in the European transfer window right now but all the seasons are staggered because of various restarts and it’s all confusing with different teams working on different timelines. We’ve just had the major news of Sarpreet Singh going out on loan to FC Nürnberg in the second tier in Germany, a perfectly reasonable move for his development which you can basically summarise as him being too good for the reserves but not quite good enough for the first team yet. At least not regular appearances in the first team and he’ll do better to get more regular footy for a team that’s actually pretty prestigious despite their current predicaments... more on that in Flying Kiwis tomorrow though.
Elsewhere there are a few names to keep a close eye out on over the coming weeks...
Liberato Cacace – Looking more and more likely he’ll finish the Welly Nix season out and beyond that it’s still Belgium that’s getting the most chat. Kevin Muscat’s team in particular... although the Netherlands has been a rumoured destination too. Let’s be honest, the dream destination is Napoli though. His dad’s home team. Somebody put a word in to Gennaro Gattuso.
Meikayla Moore – Left MSV Duisburg after helping keep them in the German top flight, currently in between clubs as she enjoys a well-earned offseason. Has definitely earned a step up with her performances for the Zebras over the last two seasons.
Erin Nayler – Supposedly she’s already signed with Reading in the WSL but still waiting for confirmation. Reading are going through a bit of a rebuild with six new signings already announced and there’ll be more where they came from too, and international transfers are a bit more difficult to clear these days. The club will be waiting ‘til she can touch ground in England before announcing anything, that way they can get a sneaky photo with a scarf held aloft as they do, or a pen in hand at a desk with a fake contract in front of her (pretty sure I read somewhere they use fake contracts, s’pose you’d have to). Better get a move on coz the first round of fixtures were announced and they start in four weeks.
Marko Stamenic – Was trialling with FC Copenhagen when the lockdowns came and he flew back to Aotearoa. An outstanding midfield prospect coming outta the Ole Academy and who played for Team Wellington last season if you’re unfamiliar. Only a matter of time before he lands somewhere.
Olivia Chance – Pretty useful for Bristol City last WSL season, a regular starter, but was only signed for one season and is currently out of contract. One of the best Ferns players at the last World Cup and ever since, way too good not to find a new home at that level.
Rebekah Stott – Been heavy on the #AsOne2023 promo work since the W-League season ended. The last four or five years Stotty has popped up in USA or Norway during the time between Aussie seasons and there’s been a huge wave of top W-League players signing in England or wider Europe lately that Stott is for sure good enough to be a part of if she wants to, having absolutely dominated the last couple years for Melbourne City. Might not be in her plans but worth a look out just in case.
Tommy Smith – Big fella still without a club since his short term deal with Sunderland ended without him making a first team appearance. He’ll get a gig somewhere in the English Football Leagues, just a matter of when and where.
No doubt plenty more where they came from too but that’s just a taster.
I finished watching this show called Lodge 49 last night. Loved it when the first season came out, for some reason took ages to get around to watching the second season (it played out late last year) but finally did and continued to love it. It’s about a slacker king optimist bloke who joins a Freemason-esque secret society at a time of directionless-ness in his life following his dad’s death and the many travails of the characters he meets there. Wyatt Russell’s the main dude, doing his best Young Jeff Bridges impersonation, and he’s great. He’s great in most things, he has a fantastic Black Mirror episode plus there’s also this great action-horror flick he’s in called Overlord where he’s a WW2 soldier who gets stuck behind enemy lines and ends up hunting Nazi zombies.
Anyway, Lodge 49 gets into all sorts of deep and esoteric areas stemming from the history of the lodge itself, with alchemy and ancient scrolls and hidden messages and psychic visions and hidden passageways and all sorts thrown into the mix (including a Thomas Pynchon reference in the title, very on brand)... but for all of that it’s also one of the most grounded shows I’ve seen in ages, in which realistic economic pressure affects realistic people and you can clearly see the attraction of these whimsical fancies for these characters as they stretch to find something better than the grinding day to day they find themselves in. Balance that with genuinely likeable characters, a sunny visual template, and a brilliant soundtrack of mostly underground tunes (there’s an Oh Sees tune in the second to last episode of season two, giving the show automatic legendary status on that fact alone) as well as woozy originals and this was a genuinely brilliant television show.
I say ‘was’ because it got canned after two seasons. AMC decided against offering a third season late last year and after trying to shop the show around other stations the creators eventually gave up the ghost. I didn’t realise that until I started watching the second season so I was seven months behind on that matter... but I did know it as I watched so when the season two finale ended on a goddamn cliffhanger, I swear to God... it’s not fair. Lodge 49 deserved a bigger audience, more recognition, and all the time it needed in the world to see this story through to its designed conclusion. But as series creator Jim Gavin said in his twitter thread about the cancellation: “maybe it's fitting that a show about a secret society remains a secret. Something people have to search for, or stumble upon, like a ring in the sand”.
So yeah I just wanted to throw out a little elegy for that bad boy. I’m very aware that as somebody with a noted penchant for esoteric wisdom, The Big Lewbowski, Thomas Pynchon novels, obscure surf rock tunes, stoical optimism, and general uncanniness in art this was a show that was extremely deep in my personal wheelhouse so I can’t really write about it without bias. But I thought it was the next best thing to perfect. Here’s the tune that Gavin referenced at the end of that thread...
(P.S. if you wanna go down an enjoyable internet rabbit hole today then google search ‘eden ahbez’, the bloke who wrote that song... the lack of capitals in his name was deliberate on his part btw, that’s just the start of an extremely wild tale)
Reading Menu
Monday Morning Dummy Half: Rugby League's Future in Aotearoa and Pacific Islands (NRL)
More Breakers Free Agency: Haere Mai Lamar Patterson, Haere Ra Scotty Hopson (NBL)
Diary Of An Aotearoa Warriors Fan: Big Changes, Stay Mellow (NRL)
Flying Kiwis – Chris Wood’s 2019-20 Season In Review (Football)